I really love writing a New Years Blog, because I really believe that many of us look at the turning of the calendar as a new beginning and a new moment to create the next year. And what most of us do, unless very present and conscious, is commit to the new year and at the same time bring the same person we have been being right into the next year.
So as the calendar turns over tonight…this year I decided to look at 2017 as the template for who I get to be to create an extraordinary 2018!
First Lesson to carry forward: BE UNATTACHED!
For me its about being “unattached vs detached”. Unattached is letting go of attachment for me, while detached is disengaging. I first ‘got’ this when right after letting go of the main part of my transformational business, I lost all of my most important jewelry and a few other items.
Losing the physical items represented the attachment I had to when I got them, who gave them to me, how long I had them, when I wore them…And the spiritual lesson was…I am not what I did, what I own, what my title was, and frankly, how much was in my bank account.
I have gotten to reconnect with who I am without any of the stuff, titles, and recognition that seemed to define me previously. When I am not being run by my ego, I must say that the experience is freeing. And has provided me with the opportunity to create, redesign, innovate and risk.
I recommend that you take on “unattachment” without the drama of losing things, or people in your life. Perhaps whatever is occurring in your life is occurring exactly as it is supposed to for your bigger life lesson or for some glorious result that will occur in the future…whatever is coming is as good or better!
Second Lesson to carry forward: IT’S OK NOT TO WIN!
This one will drive those of you that are competitive crazy. And please hear that I am not saying give up, be a wimp, and don’t stand for yourself and others. I am saying…maybe I don’t have to win an argument, win a contest, win a discussion. Yes, it is about not having to be right (that hasn’t worked ever), it is also about allowing, giving space, keeping quiet, seeing how the situation unfolds. This is also not about losing. I would never advocate selling out on yourself, the people you love or your integrity or principles.
When I can get off myself and “walk in the other person’s moccasins”, I find MY OWN PEACE. Yes, you are right most of the time…yes, they would probably benefit by seeing it your way, AND what do you want to create in that relationship….being closer or further apart?
Third Lesson to carry forward: ACTUALLY BE PRESENT WITH YOUR PEEPS.
I can thank my mom for this lesson and my kids. My mom has recently been diagnosed with dementia. She has been forgetful for awhile, and this year she has had a significant shift. She lives in two different worlds..neither of them are unpleasant gratefully. Now, I only have my own peace when I am simply with her wherever she is. Fully present and connected, enjoying whatever moments we have together. She’s happy as a clam most of the time; it is my breakthrough to be loving, present and joyful, no matter how “fascinating” the conversation gets.
My boys, Aidan and Levi are a demand that I am present. For those of you with children, you know this well. There is no pretending, faking it, half assing it, dialing it in with them. And while I don’t always like their method of letting me know I am disconnected, they always nail it.
So this year, I have been and will continue to work on being fully present when I am with them and others. I am fully aware that these lessons are not new to those of you who have embarked on a transformational journey. They were not new to me. Knowing them and experiencing them in my face are a bit different and I am so grateful for the reminder, (I do miss a few pieces of jewelry still…).
As 2018 begins, there is much occurring in our lives, our communities, our country and our world to be thankful for and much to be at stake about. The natural disasters and fires of 2017 reminded us that no one is exempt from heartache and devastation. And nothing heals like the outpouring of love, support and generosity.
I invite you to begin 2018 with kindness in your heart, courage in your spine and wisdom in your soul as we CO-CREATE our lives together!
With much love and gratitude.
Happy New Year,